Day 15

Sometimes you just can't find the energy to do your best. But up until recently days like these have been few and far between. I guess my willpower has receded substantially since the realization about missing my career goals for this year has set in.

I hope this is temporary. I need something new to focus on... something within my present company. Something to look forward to, or else the choice to stay will not have a fighting chance against the other roads to take.

Day 16

A reader asked me what will I do next if I decide to finally end my stay with my present company.

I have a lot of choices, I guess. First would be to work for another Software Company. In this choice, I would still be pursuing the same line of work, web development in J2EE. This would be the most logical choice I guess. But I also want to deal with multimedia. It's the reason I got into computers, after all. From my hobby, to my majors, to my thesis, it all says multimedia is the way to go. The third path to go on would be a step back I guess, to gear myself to the right track in the long run. It would be to secure a more subdued career(or go into enterpreneurship) in order to give myself the time to work with my passion in the arts.

Well there they are, the possible paths to take are endless and very diverse, if I may say so myself. I have to reflect on this.

Day 17

I love how weekends seem to make days leap faster. I stayed indoors all day, knowing that I might be wasting two beautiful days. But I'm trying to make the days faster, I just want to go home now.

I find it somewhat pointless now to socialize and go out with my colleagues here, I guess. One reason is that I am leaving very soon. I also do not see it being beneficial career-wise since I am still not sure if I want to further my career in my present company.

Day 21

I am not actually Mr. Perky today. Some offensive remarks from a colleague (or should I say an angel, cleverly disguised as a stupid person), and bad news from home does not actually contribute to anyone's well-being.

To this angel, in honor of my AMACC College of Computer Studies colleagues, from whose pouted lips I learned this phrase: "HUWAG KA NANG MAGMAGANDA DIYAN, HINDI KA NAMAN KAGANDAHAN".

Day 22

I know that counting the days makes the wait seem longer, but I just cannot help it. I am slightly Obsessive-compulsive after all, maybe my subconcious fears that I might actually miss my flight hehe.

Contemplating on my days here being numbered (pun intended), it made me start to wonder what would have happened if circumstance had been designed to make me stay until the end. Would I have been closer to my Filipino officemates? How about my Danish colleagues? A friend of mine once said that it is nearly impossible to find a friend in the workplace. Up until two months ago I would have tried to discredit his theory. But a lot has happened in those two months, things that prevent me from discarding this idea so hastily.

I do know one thing though, I am 22 days away from seeing some special person/s once more (Is this really plural or am I just trying to throw people off my trail, hmmm?). We'll need to sort out these feelings, and our intentions.

Counting the Days

It's 24 days to go before I come to the end of my stay here in Copenhagen. The feeling is bitter-sweet I guess. I still have some things I like to do here... people I want to know more about... acquaintances that I want to build into friendships... to see more of Europe even. But what I am giving these up for will define me as a person for the rest of my days here on Earth.

I need to revive what I lost during the sad years that have passed. My focus, my strength and my resolve.